Hung Thick Natural Foreskin

Thursday, January 10th, 2008 | The Dating Game

Meanwhile, there I am sitting on DaddyHunt, constantly shifting between “online right now” and “user history,” with absolutely no one in my “user history”–that is, guys who have checked out my profile–No one, and after uploading a new main user pic with my proto-daddy-stud Italian winter sweater and goofy glasses, which I had thought would attract the kind of guy who’d imagine antiquing with me or copping a feel in some dank Venetian rococo palazzo, when I decide, “Dang nab it” and switch my main user pic to me shirtless, photographed from slightly below and with the top of my head just cropped to lend a kind of heroic almost cinematic grandeur to my Chrissy… when lo and behold, there are like 10 users checking me out every minute, 5 new guys who have “buddy-listed” me already… Men. We’re so predictable and so shallow. I completely ignore the “average-average-no foreskin” guys (“length-girth-cut/uncut”–Could you believe one could actually know these things ahead of time? Bless you, DaddyHunt) and go straight for the few “hung-thick-natural foreskin” guys, knowing full-well that “average-average-no foreskin” is what my future most-likely holds. Mr. Hung Thick Natural Foreskin is telling me about his figurative painting class. He’s cute, with a German accent (I imagine) and a real interest in art and theory, which we discuss in our relative states of near-graphic nudity. Bob told me that he met a guy for coffee that he had chatted with on DaddyHunt. After their coffee date, Bob asked, “Well?” and the guy replied, “Well, I’ll have to see your pictures.” Bob was kind of stunned. I mean, he was right there.

Okay, I’d better get back to Mr. Hung Thick Natural Foreskin…

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