Last night I was up late finishing this year’s plum jam, but was pleasantly entertained by many near-naked Italians flashing questo and quello at me over their webcams. Little could I do but flash a fruit-laden spoon back at them. Tonight I’m off for a few weeks to Florida. Yes, in August. Could you imagine? My sister assures me that her air conditioner will be set to 78. Great. I plan to stay wet most of the time, bobbing around in the Gulf, sniffing wet fur, and eating grouper sandwiches with my many siblings. I’m hoping to make it to Weeki Wachi and the mermaids this time. My sisters seem to have finally noticed that I’ve been wearing the same swim suit for 20 years, so I decided to bring my package-enhancing vertical-lined slenderizing suit while I can still get away with it.
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It’s really beautiful here today, breezy and warm, the sky a lovely azure blue. The last colors and scents of the summer fill my garden–the rhodies and camelias are already setting their buds. Sunburns and beer bellies, here I come! Woo hoo! More from Anita Bryant country.