Change the channel and see what’s happening on The Dating Game! Has it really been more than two weeks since the last episode? Tune in, cats and kittens, to that glorious day, a fortnight ago when #9 came climbing up my hill for chicken mole, bearing a dessert whose main component was a caramel sauce made with goat’s milk. Omigod. I was, unfortunately, seized by a pollen-infused histamine fit and forced to abandon plans for caramel covered activities beyond ice cream. I was convinced upon kicking him out that we were headed in a certain direction, but a week and the Al Gore movie and still no lip action later, I’m wondering if we’re still on the same path. Or maybe I exercised too much restraint? Bad breath?
Crepes and urban hiking with #10, who’s off to save the family business on the great Salt Lake.
Meanwhile, back to #8… I introduced him to my buddies, Peter and Luis, at dinner Saturday night. He’s the first to make contact with my inner circle, or to not be a part of it already. He performed well, and as it turns out, knew our friend Augustine, and, as I learned later, has slept with my best friend N___, and fairly recently, but still before me. That’s N___ the designer with the boyfriend, whose relationship as far as I know isn’t open, but more about that later… Anyway, for dinner I made carciofi alla Judea (prepared artichoke hearts and stems fried in olive oil until they open like flowers–artichokes that have died and gone to heaven in Rome’s Jewish quarter); papardelle with a lamb ragu, flavored with rosemary, saffron and orange (thanks Philip for the orange and roasting tips!); an arugula salad, and for dessert a plum upside down cake. I asked #8 after dinner what he was looking for in a relationship and he answered, “You.”
I’m growing fonder of him.
So he told me about N___ last night just before seeing Joe Goode’s fabulous new piece at Yerba Buena, which was completely entertaining, passing seamlessly and giddily between humor and weepy sentimentality. Not many artists can do that. He seems to find humor in any situation, but without undermining the emotional gravity. Okay, so when #8 told me about N___, I felt myself growing intensely jealous. Of course I hid my jealousy with masterly self-control, but was taken aback by my caveman-like inner response to his announcement. And details. Like way too many details. N___ is the most gorgeous and talented person I know. Gorgeous and charming. Charming and warm. Warm and a good cook. And super hot for #8. So why did #8 choose me over him? (I’m mentally erasing N____’s boyfriend as I pose that question.) Besides being the total perfection of each of their types, #8 and N___ seem to make the perfect couple on my reality show. When he puts his arm around me when strolling through the Castro, I don’t feel that yet, that we make sense as a couple.
#4 asked me the other day if I am emotionally available to be in a relationship right now. I told him that it’s more of a logistical problem at this point. We’ll be seeing him next week. Yes I’m emotionally available, but no I’m not ready to be in a relationship. I’m dating, and enjoying every minute of it. Date me!
TWO MORE WEEKS TO CATCH MY SHOW—MERIDIAN GALLERY, 545 SUTER STREET, TUES-SAT 11-5